Friday, June 14, 2013

Missing you

Dearest Mikkie,

I just want to tell you my heart is so heavy and aching right now and The hole in my heart is in pain again. I'm missing you terribly. Something just hit me as I was getting ready for bed and I couldn't contain the tears. 
Maybe it's the fact that Spencer especially reminded me so much of you today. 
Maybe it's because Faiths friend is the same age as you and is without a friend. 
Maybe it's because tomorrow is the 14th. 
Maybe it's because I'm scared maybe I'm starting to forget. 

Maybe all of it combined has caused this bubble of emotion to rise up in me and the only sensible way to deal with it is to go with it and let myself truly feel it. 
My spirit obviously needs to feel it, and I'm ok with it. I'm not afraid of the pain. 

I love you so much. That phrase doesn't even seem adequate for the amount of love I have for you nor the amount for how much and how deeply I miss my little girl. 

I can't see the screen anymore... I love you, be with me tonight sweet angel. 

Love always, 



Liz said...

I go through episodes when I seem to be more emotional about my baby girl too. Its weird what triggers it. I always just think that maybe she has been with me more that day and my spirit is feeling it. Just know she is definitely with you on days like these.