Death

Sweet angel Mikkie,

Death has been on my mind a lot lately. I read that this world is the land of the dying, the next is the land of the living (where you are!). For so long I've always thought the opposite, I feared death, but here in this mortal existence is definitely the land of the dying. I think why then do we fear death? I guess before, it was because no one close to me had passed so I was clinging to life and my loved ones, deathly afraid of ever being parted from them. Now I'm torn between wanting to go and wanting to stay, I so desperately want to hold you in my arms again and see your sweet, precious face, but thoughts of leaving Faith and your daddy behind is an unbearable one. So, I'm stuck here feeling like I'm in limbo, knowing I cannot be completely happy until we're reunited with you.

Another thought I had when I was talking with your daddy is this life is like school for us. We come here to learn and be tested over and over. The point being, we are in school, waiting to go on with "real life" like you :) Death is a new beginning.

In the book "For they shall be comforted" once again, I liked the following quote:
" The change called death is ordained of God and is a blessing to man. It would be tragic if men could never be released from mortality that they might put on immortality. Death releases man from his mortal existence and makes it possible his onward progress toward eternal life and exaltation."
I agree with that. Can you imagine being stuck here on this earth? Now that to me would be a hell. After I read that quote I really see death as a blessing.

Another quote says, " I care not whether I am dying or not; for if I die I shall be with God; if I live, He will be with me." I would feel the same way too if it weren't for my family... they are the only reason I care to be alive, well that and shaping myself up so I can be a better person. :)

This quote really stuck out to me as well: "The Lord takes away, even in infancy, that they may escape the envy of man, and the sorrows and evils of this present world; they were too pure, too lovely, to live on earth; therefore if rightly considered, instead of mourning we have reason to rejoice as they are delivered from evil, and we shall soon have them again."
I am indeed grateful that you don't have to suffer in this wicked world anymore, I should be rejoicing more for your sake. I guess my mourning is selfish then, more for myself; I'm happy for you that you are saved, you have nothing to worry about, it is you that should be mourning for me and the rest of us stuck here.

What gives me most comfort is "Death comes to all of us, but so does life everlasting."
Wow. Since death will be coming to us no matter what we do, the best thing we could do for ourselves is to get prepared. Make sure we give forgiveness where it's due, learn to love ourselves and others with a Christ-like love, make sure that if we would die today we would have absolutely no regrets. That's my goal, to live as if I were dying. Because, we are after all, dying a little more each and every day, getting closer and closer to the land of the living. :)

I will write again soon sweet baby girl, for I have much to say.

Love me always,

Mama