Sunday, August 22, 2010

Sleep deprived

Dear Mikkie,

Your sister Faith is having a very hard time with sleep. Before we went on vacation, do you remember that big thunder and lightning storm we had? She's been scared ever since and will not sleep by herself. It was ok to deal with before. Having to deal with that on top of everything else that has happened this past week...... it's a little more than I can handle.
Can you be her guardian angel? She's fine otherwise, but when she doesn't get good sleep she's irrational, grumpy and it makes me even more sad than I am. I'm praying fervently that God will comfort her and that as we continue to explain to and calm her, she'll be blessed with peace and will be able to sleep great like she used to.

I can tell she misses you. She knows. She knows things are different. She notices you aren't there when she goes to bed, and that the crib is still empty when she wakes up, or when she eats. She notices you're not there watching her while she plays her games online. She notices you're not there next to her in the car to share treats and play peek-a-boo with. She notices the house is a little more quiet without your cute little laugh, the pitter patter of your feet running around, and even your whining is gone- as exhausting as it was to hear, I'd rather hear that than the lonely silence we hear now. She notices her best friend in the whole world is not around to play anymore.
She asks me every night, "Where's Mikkie, where's Mikkie mommy?" I give her the look that says I know you know. She says, "Mikkie's with Jesus. Mikkie's happy, Mikkie's happy." I can't tell if she's saying that to comfort me or if she's saying that to convince herself. Either way, she misses you very much.


Doty Family said...

This just pulls at my heartstrings. When I was nine, my dad died very suddenly and my little brother, who was 4 at the time, asked "Where's Daddy?" for the longest time. It's so hard to understand when you are that little. Mikkie is with her and with you and your husband. Your own little sweet guardian angel. I'll keep praying.

Amber said...

Nothing and no one could ever replace her dear sweet sister. I hope the Comforter comes to Faith quickly so she too can feel peace (and also get some sleep). I hope you aren't sick of hearing this, but you are in our prayers.
Whenever you are ready (and if you would like to) we should have play dates. I know Sami was so intrigued by Faith, they would play great together.

Kristen said...

My heart hurts for you! I hope this blog helps you through this. Please know that God hears you and loves you! I have 2 girls about the same ages. I hurt so much because we almost had that same scare just 3 days ago. It is still so vivid in my mind. I pray for you and your family!!

Melita said...

Oh bless her dear little heart ..May God send His Angels to watch over her and bring her comfort and peace ...God bless you all many hugs Melita xxx