Hi my sweet Mikkie,
There's times in life where I experience this sort of emptiness, like I'm missing something and now is one of those times. It's when I take a step back, evaluate my life and realize I need to be closer to Christ, I need to strengthen my testimony and spiritually feed my starving soul.
Last year I had read a book called, "21 Days Closer to Christ". It was a beautiful read, but I didn't really put my effort into the journey of it, so I'm determined to do it this year and when's a more perfect time other than this season of Gratitude and coming up on celebrating Christ's birth. Since Thanksgiving is on the 22nd, I thought November 1st a perfect time to start and end on Thanksgiving Day. I'm a day late in posting Day 1, but here we go.... My 21 day journey of becoming closer to my Savior.
Day 1- Come.
This day talks about the invitation to "Come and See". Christ always asked His followers to come, then He showed them the blessings that followed the simple invitation (water turned to wine, loaves and fishes multiplied, the lame walked, blind saw, dead would live again). The invitation was always given and we could do as the disciples did and forsook their nets and followed Him or we could continue our journey alone, completely missing the blessings of wondrous sights we may have experienced.
It gives a good point when it says, "We are pulled at on every side by distractions that entangle us. Time constraints, daily chores, work demands, worldly pursuits, pride or other pressures may prevent us from developing a relationship with Christ. If we are to be truly happy, if we are to reach our full potential, we must create a place for the Savior in our lives."
Wow, went straight to my heart. Time is always slipping from us too quickly, and by filling the spare time we rarely have with things which will distract us... it becomes lonely, which is what I am experiencing. I need to feel closer to my Savior, I need to make more time for Him.
What fills my nets are really quite petty. Most of it anyways, and I'm done having them hold me back from developing a relationship with Christ.
Invitations to Come and See in this past day have been few due to my still lack of focus, but they have been sweet.
I feel invitations quite often to just hold your baby brother and look at him. As I look into his face, the miracle and tender mercy I see is how very much he looks like you, Mikayla. So much it brings tears to my eyes and I thank my Father in Heaven for this seemingly small thing but means the world to me. Had I not taken the time to pick up Spencer and hold him, I would not have gotten to have the sweet, tender moment of him cuddling up to and hugging me, reminding me of your oh so sweet "Mikkie hugs".
Not only do I feel the invitation to come to Spencer, but your sister Faith as well. I came down to the kitchen to see if she was ready to go to school and I see her hiding under the table. I ask her what she's doing and to come out from under there. She slowly comes up and clearly with a saddened countenance. When I ask her what is wrong she replies with tears streaming down her cheeks, "I just really miss Mikkie." My heart was immediately softened and I brought her in close to me and hugged her and kissed her head as we both sat there with tears in our eyes and longing in our hearts. I looked at her beautiful face and told her how very much I love her and that I know how much her sister Mikkie loves her, and probably misses her fiercely as well. I suggested that we talk about our favorite memories about you, Mikkie, and as we did we laughed, cried some more and smiled as we thought of all the precious times we had with you.
Both of these times as I took the time to Come and See my little children, I felt the love of God fill my heart, as children are so pure and innocent and the closest thing to Heaven. I'm confident that if everyone took more time to just really look at their children and hold them close more, they would feel closer to Christ.
I love you very much, sweet girl of mine. My heart is already full of gratitude as I think how incredibly blessed I am to have 3 of the most precious children I could ever ask for.
Love,
Mama
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